James Story

It is finally done!! So this is something I have been working on. I had the privilege of interviewing my friend James  I am grateful that he took the time out of his day to speak to me and to share a part of him and his story. I talk a lot about the importance of sharing stories and how stories have the ability to change lives, build community, connection and provide moments of realization that we are not alone in our pain and struggle AND there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Things do get better. I ask that you listen to this podcast with an open heart and an open mind. That you forgive me for the bad quality of sound in the beginning but that you stick through it because the sound does get better (It’s my first interview ever so please be nice haha)

Here’s a description of our talk :
“I dove into a part of my friend James story and journey in life; Drinking and driving leading to a tragic loss. James transparently discusses personal struggles, hurts, his journey of healing and what he continues to do to heal from his past and care for himself. Choosing love over fear, choosing love over negativity.”

I pray that this resonates with a lot of you out there. That it touches your heart, inspires conversation, and creates a space and environment of hope, healing, love, and community. I hope that this inspires many of my friends and family to take the time to get to know strangers and their stories and that it gives you the courage to share your story.

Stories change lives

And if you’d love to be a part of this project and share your story, message me!

xo

DONT QUIT

“When things go wrong as they sometimes will,

When the road you’re trudging seems all up hill,

When the funds are low and the debts are high

And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,

When care is pressing you down a bit,

Rest if you must, but don’t you quit.

Life is strange with its twists and turns

As every one of us sometimes learns

And many a failure comes about

When he might have won had he stuck it out;

Don’t give up though the pace seems slow—

You may succeed with another blow.

Success is failure turned inside out—

The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,

And you never can tell just how close you are,

It may be near when it seems so far;

So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit—

It’s when things seem worst that you must not quit.”

– By John Greenleaf Whittier

Passing it on

I came across this photo on my Facebook feed and it brought back memories…

suicide quote

I remember one of the last times I had attempted to commit suicide I thought to myself that the pain would finally be over.  ((About 10 or so years ago )) I remember thinking that this time would be it. I was tired of drowning. I was tired of feeling like it wasn’t going to get any better but when the deed had been done I remember thinking wtf am I doing. I wanted to take back what I had just done but it was too late.

I remember this like it was yesterday, my mom approaching me her eyes so big and full of fear. She didn’t know what to say. She was in complete shock,  scared and shaking. Now my mom had always been and continues to be my superhero. She is the strongest woman I know alive, has been through SO much and continues to persevere through so much and on that night when I saw her full of all those emotions, full of pain, I remember thinking that if I ever made it through the night and didn’t die, that I would never want to cause my mom that much pain ever again. I never wanted to see her that way EVER.

It had never clicked in my head before but that night I finally understood what this quote says, that those who take their lives away don’t end their pain but pass it on to those they love. I thank God every day that I had that revelation that night. That I realized that I never wanted to hurt the person who meant the world to me that way ever again. Even if life sucked. Even if I felt like I was drowning. I made a decision to fight and get through it with God by my side and over 10 years later I can say that I did thanks to Him. I have hit rock bottom in worse ways than that period in my life but not once did I think about killing myself and that to me is something worth celebrating.

So it is not impossible! You can get through it National Suicide Prevention Line 1-800-273-8255. They are there because they want to make a difference and help as many people as possible.

God was there for me and He is there for you too! 

Don’t give up! 

Life full of peace or stress?

I was reading an article today about the importance of peace in ones life. What drew me in was the realization that a life full of turmoil to many may seem very normal and everyday. The article went on to say that a life full of peace can be seen as boring since most of us are used to constant drama of sorts and/or stress in our lives.

I can relate to that to an extent. I struggle getting up early in the morning. I’m not a morning person but I sleep well enough to get up at 6am.  I’ve noticed I struggle getting up at that time but if I did I would have a ton of free time before work. If i were to get up early I wouldn’t be running around and rushing to get ready and eat breakfast. Which means I would get A LOT done and have less stress.

Sounds great right?

The thing is for some odd reason  there’s an unconscious part of me that feels really uncomfortable about not feeling stressed or not running around to get things done. I strive off of working under pressure.

Double edged sword.

I hate being stressed but love running around and rushing. Being and staying busy.  It’s become such a norm for me to function under stress that I’ve lost the ability to function without it. It’s like I don’t know what to do with myself but after reading that article I realized I need to learn to work and function under peace AND it’s totally okay and shouldn’t be seen as boring or uneventful!

Now the media is full of constant drama, headaches, heartaches, stress, How to’s on learning to multitask and rush around better and maybe that’s why we feel the need to live our lives on the go, rush rush rushing everywhere. Maybe that’s why when we manage our time well and have nothing to do we freak out.

But I feel we weren’t meant to live those kinds of lives and we would be so much happier if we learned to be more peaceful.

For the sake of defining peace and stress, peace is defined as “free from disturbance; tranquil” and stress is defined as “a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or very demanding circumstances.” I don’t know about you but I most certainly prefer peace!

Now I know that life will always be full of ups and downs and moments of stress we may not be able to help but I think there are many areas of our lives that can be changed around a bit to be full of more peace, joy and happiness. To those out there with similar struggles, let’s learn to live a life full of peace. It doesn’t mean we are living a boring life but a smarter and more enjoyable one!

I’d love to know what anyone else thinks about the matter