James Story

It is finally done!! So this is something I have been working on. I had the privilege of interviewing my friend James  I am grateful that he took the time out of his day to speak to me and to share a part of him and his story. I talk a lot about the importance of sharing stories and how stories have the ability to change lives, build community, connection and provide moments of realization that we are not alone in our pain and struggle AND there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Things do get better. I ask that you listen to this podcast with an open heart and an open mind. That you forgive me for the bad quality of sound in the beginning but that you stick through it because the sound does get better (It’s my first interview ever so please be nice haha)

Here’s a description of our talk :
“I dove into a part of my friend James story and journey in life; Drinking and driving leading to a tragic loss. James transparently discusses personal struggles, hurts, his journey of healing and what he continues to do to heal from his past and care for himself. Choosing love over fear, choosing love over negativity.”

I pray that this resonates with a lot of you out there. That it touches your heart, inspires conversation, and creates a space and environment of hope, healing, love, and community. I hope that this inspires many of my friends and family to take the time to get to know strangers and their stories and that it gives you the courage to share your story.

Stories change lives

And if you’d love to be a part of this project and share your story, message me!

xo

Passing it on

I came across this photo on my Facebook feed and it brought back memories…

suicide quote

I remember one of the last times I had attempted to commit suicide I thought to myself that the pain would finally be over.  ((About 10 or so years ago )) I remember thinking that this time would be it. I was tired of drowning. I was tired of feeling like it wasn’t going to get any better but when the deed had been done I remember thinking wtf am I doing. I wanted to take back what I had just done but it was too late.

I remember this like it was yesterday, my mom approaching me her eyes so big and full of fear. She didn’t know what to say. She was in complete shock,  scared and shaking. Now my mom had always been and continues to be my superhero. She is the strongest woman I know alive, has been through SO much and continues to persevere through so much and on that night when I saw her full of all those emotions, full of pain, I remember thinking that if I ever made it through the night and didn’t die, that I would never want to cause my mom that much pain ever again. I never wanted to see her that way EVER.

It had never clicked in my head before but that night I finally understood what this quote says, that those who take their lives away don’t end their pain but pass it on to those they love. I thank God every day that I had that revelation that night. That I realized that I never wanted to hurt the person who meant the world to me that way ever again. Even if life sucked. Even if I felt like I was drowning. I made a decision to fight and get through it with God by my side and over 10 years later I can say that I did thanks to Him. I have hit rock bottom in worse ways than that period in my life but not once did I think about killing myself and that to me is something worth celebrating.

So it is not impossible! You can get through it National Suicide Prevention Line 1-800-273-8255. They are there because they want to make a difference and help as many people as possible.

God was there for me and He is there for you too! 

Don’t give up! 

Taking care of YOU

I came across this picture on my instagram and think it to be so true and something we all need to live by! A lot of the time we focus on what everyone else needs to fix. We become professional advice givers and want to help change the world and the people in it BUT (drumrolllllllll) we don’t do any of that for ourselves!

We have to learn to take care of ourselves first.

We can’t truly love or help someone properly unless we learn to love and help ourselves first.  Work on you! Learn to love who you are mistakes and all. Learn to become confident in yourself, overcome those insecurities, work on being healthy, and becoming the best version of you. Learn to manage your time better, to save money, learn to get through your weaknesses whether it’s anger, impatience, or procrastination. Once that happens (and it will) then it makes helping others so much easier.

You have to fill your glass with water first before you can pour out to others

AND

every time your glass ends up empty, it just means it’s time to fill it again.

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From Thoughts to Destiny

As we go through our struggles , there comes a moment (at least for me) where I feet stuck. As if I was on a merry go round of ups and downs with the same crappy things happening over and over again. I came across this quote that really changed my perspective on things. I have included different variations of the same concept. The end result of our lives start with our thoughts!

“Watch your thoughts, they become words;
watch your words, they become actions;
watch your actions, they become habits;
watch your habits, they become character;
watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.”

-FRANK OUTLAW
Late President of the Bi-Lo Stores

The only way to change repeating circumstances in our lives is by doing something different, and that all begins with our thoughts. If we believe that we cannot do something, than guess what? We will not be able to do it. But if we believe that we can, and we wake up every morning believing that things can change and will change, than that’s when change will begin to take place.

So for this week, be conscious of your thoughts. Be mindful of what you are telling yourself over and over again and if you realize that your thoughts are full of negativity, switch it up. Don’t dwell on that negativity because as the quote goes, your thoughts trickle down and become your character. And if that is not who you want to be than start at the core with your thoughts. Start thinking of positive things that are going to happen no matter how unrealistic it may seem and I can promise you that things will begin to change. Maybe not right away or overnight, but with time they will. Once your thoughts change, everything else will follow.

The thought manifests as the word,

The word manifests as the deed,
The deed develops into habit,
And the habit hardens into character.
So watch the thought and its way with care,
And let it spring from love
Born out of concern for all beings.

-Anonymous

*

We are what we think.
All that we are arises with our thoughts.
With our thoughts we make the world.
Speak or act with an impure mind
And trouble will follow you
As the wheel follows the ox that draws the cart.

-Anonymous

*

“Watch your thoughts, they become words;
watch your words, they become actions;
watch your actions, they become habits;
watch your habits, they become character;
watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.”

-FRANK OUTLAW
Late President of the Bi-Lo Stores

And if anyone finds the writer of these quotes, please let me know so I can give them credit.

Care Package: FUN

My amazing friend Senny Lee’s dad runs an orphanage in Cambodia (The ministry is called Transformasia – http://www.transformasia.us/ ) full of a ton of awesome kids who play with rocks all day. Yup, rocks because they don’t have and can’t afford anything to play with. Because of this, Care Package:FUN was born and we need your help!

We are putting together fun packages for kiddos full of skateboards, dolls, footballs, jump ropes, and anything functional that kids can play with outside. (We are trying to steer away from action figure like toys and would prefer more interactive outside oriented items) But in order to do this, help is needed!

If anyone has old skateboards, baseballs, footballs, jump ropes, basketballs, dolls, cards etc that you no longer want but would love to donate to the cause, it would be much appreciated!!

**We will also be putting together a couple of mini packages for sale later down the road to go towards the cause so keep an eye out**

I love playing around and having a good time and honestly I think it would be awesome if we can help other kids do the same!

Message me if you’d like to donate :) ❤ 

Truth behind depression

Such a powerful video!

This video really hit home for me. Right now I’m still a bit speechless for a lot of reasons. I sat here trying to think of what to write and say but words just aren’t coming to mind. Instead I decided to post some responses to the video that I came across.

(All these responses are on the videos page on Facebook)

“”Ricky” is the guy next to you as you order your coffee, he’s the guy you may even have rolled your eyes at because he seems off or ordinary. He could even be that guy trying to fit in at work or at the gym. Point is, he could be anyone on any given day that you and/or I cross paths with.”

– Leila Alverado 

*

“You still aren’t seeing the whole picture… They’re both depressed. With the main character in every splice, it is obvious he is depressed. However, with Ricky it was not obvious, until it was too late. Some cases of depression are easy to detect, while other cases are not so easy. Which is the exact point that Buzzfeed is making through this video.”

 -Dalton Locke

*

“This tripped me. Woah, what a valuable video. The greatest of attitudes doesn’t mean total happiness all the time. We treat people all kinds of negative ways and we have no clue what they’re dealing with. We don’t care until they’re gone. That’s the scary part.”

-Trenton Scipio

*

This really hit home with me, I suffer from depression and have since I was a teen. All my friends and family knew me as the “happy” person, even now I’m the “good morning” and “good night” person at work and at home. No one knew until very recent that I not only struggle with depression, but a history of self harm as well. I cried and had to watch this a few times, I know from experience that people who really suffer put on that happy face because we don’t want to bring everyone else down with us, or because we don’t think anyone will understand or even care. It’s hard to reach people like us because we don’t want anyone to know we’re suffering, for whatever reason, we don’t want that attention

-Jasmine Thompson

*

“The sad part is that the signs -are- there, they’re just not the ones we’re looking for. Sometimes depression looks like the guy in the video, but sometimes it looks like Ricky and I’ll tell you why. The way people cope is different, as many already know. Ricky was trying to repress his depression and loneliness by brightening other people’s days so that they don’t have to feel the way he does. Greeting others was also his way of reaching out, of trying to get “attention” (not in a negative connotation), in hopes someone would smile back or say “hey, how was your weekend? Wanna meet up later this week?” But he didn’t receive it.”

– Danny Giraud

Inspiration and Reminder

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Came across this today while searching for inspirational quotes and it really inspired me. This is the kind of life I want to live. Being a Christian, these past few years I have focused on bettering myself because my goal is to be more Christ-like.

Now of course I could never be Christ but the life that Jesus lived is the kind of life I want to live. A life of love, forgiveness, treating people with respect, not judging, loving your enemies, etc. So when I saw this quote I thought that it was similar to my goal in life.

I want people to look at me and not feel hatred, judgement, or any form of negativity. I want people to look at me and understand that I have gone through so much and have never given up so they too can get through it. I want to push people to be better, to not give up, to hold onto hope, to push through, to get up when they get knocked down. I want God to use me to heal broken hearts.

So even if you do not believe in God, it’s okay. Because I just want you to remember to not give up. Keep fighting. Your life is worth it and you have a purpose